Tuesday, February 25, 2003
the theme song for this show features a bunch of girls singing in gibberish that i'm sure was supposed to be english, because they are signing in english now. but before it was a random jumble of sounds that didn't sound like anything at ALL. fabulous, i say
a crying hamster just slipped a disk into some girls pocket. i think the girls older brother/dad is trying to get with her, and the guitar guy is talking all funny like. he said overseas bonanza, but i don't know why. he is a rainbow in the darkness, a masterpiece unsigned, a hole without a donut. what a rebel, raddest hamster ever
so, as i sit here watching this show called Hamtaro starring shapeless blobs that i can only assume are supposed to be hamsters, i wonder where my tastes lie these days. tastes are another wierd thing. they are the reflection of the person i guess, because mine are wacky, random, and usually don't make much sense until i explain them too you. for some reason watching these blobs jump in and out of dresser drawers is entertaining. i just realized i hadn't been listening to any of the dialouge, so i have no idea whats going on. one of the dudes has a guitar and a mohawk, this guy rocks. he's one cool hamster!
you know, this is so much better than work. i can entertain myself forever if i have no responsibilities or obligations
you know, this is so much better than work. i can entertain myself forever if i have no responsibilities or obligations
Sunday, February 23, 2003
i had a great night, it was fabulous. i want to do it again every night, fun times with people i enjoy being with.
this goes out to ryan.
its really wierd when you try to chip in your opinion on something when your line of thinking is completely out of the norm. like, i rarely offer up an opinion for a few reasons. first, i don't want to have to defend it, and whenever i offer any sort of belief up, it leaves it open for attack. its not like i really care one way or another too much, but someone obviously does, and they asked me. so i say something, but its the wrong damn thing, so they start yelling at me. and its not because i'm wrong or anything, its just because they expect me to back up my beliefs. i wouldn't even have the damn things if you didn't force me to think about it for the sake of your inane conversation. second, my opinions usually don't mesh well with other peoples standard way of thinking. like, they try to lump it into their black and white right and wrong, when really i'm thinking about it completely differently. so instead of talking about my damn opinion, i end up having to explain this whole long thing, when really all they wanted to do was to bitch to me about their opinion on something. they should have just started bitching to me in the first place so i could start tuning out earlier without having to think about something to respond with. it would have been easier for both of us. granted, i'm the same way, i always want people to listen to me when i actually think i have something to contribute, but its just annoying with most people, because they weren't even thinking the same shit i was thinking, so our opinions don't have any relevance at all when they are compared. that kind of happened tonight, like, we were having this conversation, and 3 of us were arguing 3 different sides of 3 different arguements, but we all felt attacked, so we all felt compelled to explain ourselves. i realized straight off that my views on what i was thinking didn't really matter at all, but i had talked and therefore was obligated to keep talking just for the sake of the conversation. so i'm trying to fit my views into their 2 conversations when what i was talking about was really just on the outskirts of their thought pattern. eventually i was just like fuck it, i really don't care, so i walked off.
communication is a frustrating thing sometimes. it really shouldn't be, but it is, because no one is ever on the same wavelength as you are. because, if you are on the same wavelength, there isn't a need for discussion, or arguement, or even conversation at all. it just isn't necessary. this is why i seemed detached a lot i guess, i just don't feel like explaining what i'm talking about to some moron wanker who happens to be running around at the time, so i just continue the conversation in my head, where stupid moron wankers can't interrupt me with stupid moron talking. because in the end, its not worth it, it just pisses everyone off. its a lose lose situation. you are left feeling unsatisfied and misunderstood, and them, well, they are still a moron so who fucking cares.
belligerent rant off. that actually felt kind of good :)
this goes out to ryan.
its really wierd when you try to chip in your opinion on something when your line of thinking is completely out of the norm. like, i rarely offer up an opinion for a few reasons. first, i don't want to have to defend it, and whenever i offer any sort of belief up, it leaves it open for attack. its not like i really care one way or another too much, but someone obviously does, and they asked me. so i say something, but its the wrong damn thing, so they start yelling at me. and its not because i'm wrong or anything, its just because they expect me to back up my beliefs. i wouldn't even have the damn things if you didn't force me to think about it for the sake of your inane conversation. second, my opinions usually don't mesh well with other peoples standard way of thinking. like, they try to lump it into their black and white right and wrong, when really i'm thinking about it completely differently. so instead of talking about my damn opinion, i end up having to explain this whole long thing, when really all they wanted to do was to bitch to me about their opinion on something. they should have just started bitching to me in the first place so i could start tuning out earlier without having to think about something to respond with. it would have been easier for both of us. granted, i'm the same way, i always want people to listen to me when i actually think i have something to contribute, but its just annoying with most people, because they weren't even thinking the same shit i was thinking, so our opinions don't have any relevance at all when they are compared. that kind of happened tonight, like, we were having this conversation, and 3 of us were arguing 3 different sides of 3 different arguements, but we all felt attacked, so we all felt compelled to explain ourselves. i realized straight off that my views on what i was thinking didn't really matter at all, but i had talked and therefore was obligated to keep talking just for the sake of the conversation. so i'm trying to fit my views into their 2 conversations when what i was talking about was really just on the outskirts of their thought pattern. eventually i was just like fuck it, i really don't care, so i walked off.
communication is a frustrating thing sometimes. it really shouldn't be, but it is, because no one is ever on the same wavelength as you are. because, if you are on the same wavelength, there isn't a need for discussion, or arguement, or even conversation at all. it just isn't necessary. this is why i seemed detached a lot i guess, i just don't feel like explaining what i'm talking about to some moron wanker who happens to be running around at the time, so i just continue the conversation in my head, where stupid moron wankers can't interrupt me with stupid moron talking. because in the end, its not worth it, it just pisses everyone off. its a lose lose situation. you are left feeling unsatisfied and misunderstood, and them, well, they are still a moron so who fucking cares.
belligerent rant off. that actually felt kind of good :)
Saturday, February 22, 2003
its wierd how birthdays sneak up on you.... i didn't even really remember i had one this year until a few days ago. but anyways, i'm 22 now. i don't know what that means, but i am. i'm 22 on 2/22 hee hee. if i had been born a year earlier like i always thought i should have been, i would be 22 on 2/22/02, but alas. 1980 seems like such a better year to be born in than 1981. who is it fooling with that 1 on the end anyways. numbers are a funny thing
Tuesday, February 18, 2003
so yeah, california trip was kind of wierd to me....
the really wierd part was my sisters friend. i'm trying to take a nap (unsuccessfully) after our 19 hour marathon drive when my sister and her friend and boyfriend get there. i'm half awake and in walks the spitting image of my ex-girlfriend Ali. fuck me, that threw me off. i was just uncomfortable, it was just WIERD. i mean, she looked EXACTLY like her, acted like her, talked like her, jeebus. so needless to say, i'm a knob. i will always be one, and will always act like one
it pisses me off because it made me uncomfortable. i mean, really, how long ago was that? how freaking short was that? why should it even bother me. but still, it really caught me with my pants down. here i am, already freaking out and depressed about being unemployed, failing out of college, running out of money, i mean my life is in shambles. and now in walks the girl that symbolizes my biggest romantic and social failure of the past few years. before i was a failure at school at work. i was almost fine with that. but now i'm reminded that i'm an all around failure. great.
it is embarassing that it even bothered me. i feel like such an asshat right now, as i did all weekend.
blah, i'll talk about the trip later. i'm going to go hide in my book again
the really wierd part was my sisters friend. i'm trying to take a nap (unsuccessfully) after our 19 hour marathon drive when my sister and her friend and boyfriend get there. i'm half awake and in walks the spitting image of my ex-girlfriend Ali. fuck me, that threw me off. i was just uncomfortable, it was just WIERD. i mean, she looked EXACTLY like her, acted like her, talked like her, jeebus. so needless to say, i'm a knob. i will always be one, and will always act like one
it pisses me off because it made me uncomfortable. i mean, really, how long ago was that? how freaking short was that? why should it even bother me. but still, it really caught me with my pants down. here i am, already freaking out and depressed about being unemployed, failing out of college, running out of money, i mean my life is in shambles. and now in walks the girl that symbolizes my biggest romantic and social failure of the past few years. before i was a failure at school at work. i was almost fine with that. but now i'm reminded that i'm an all around failure. great.
it is embarassing that it even bothered me. i feel like such an asshat right now, as i did all weekend.
blah, i'll talk about the trip later. i'm going to go hide in my book again
Friday, February 14, 2003
CRAB KLABASH!!!!!!
no pepsi, CRAB KLABASH, or mountain dew
ewwww YUCK WWEEEEE GROSSS!!!! i'll take a crab juice!!!!!!!
and thus my favorite nickname for one of my favorite beverages has been resurrected!
no pepsi, CRAB KLABASH, or mountain dew
ewwww YUCK WWEEEEE GROSSS!!!! i'll take a crab juice!!!!!!!
and thus my favorite nickname for one of my favorite beverages has been resurrected!
Thursday, February 13, 2003
i am scared right now, because if i had a gun and someone from turbo tax in front of me, i would shoot them in the head. the fact that i know i would do this frightens me :(
everyone, please, listen to me here. DO NOT USE TURBO TAX TO DO YOUR TAXES. they will fucking screw you. SCREW YOU.
so, i went to do my taxes through this whole e-filing tax freedom thing. i did it, blah blah, they were like come back in 24 hours to complete it. it was all supposed to be free. the told me the entire time that there were no charges. NO CHARGES. i was like, yeehaw. so i went back today and logged in like they said. it came up with a thing that said you can't finish your return until you pay us. i was like WHAT THE FUCK. i tried to find their tech support, there is really jack shit in that category. they had a faq that said "why are you charging me if you said it was free." i went to there, went through every step, the last one was something like "log out and start over." so i did. now this is the fucking retarded part. when i went through it again, they already had all my stuff saved, so i just kind of clicked through. only this time, my refund was $340 more than they said the first time. i was like WOO HOO. but i get to the end, and they are like no, you already filed, pay us. you can't get your refund until you pay them. i was like wait a second, what about my extra money. then they were like, you have to do this other part, file an amendum or something. so i went to do that. i went through it all, and they said i couldn't do it because the information hadn't changed. I was like, NO FUCKING SHIT NOTHING CHANGED. but i went through, and changed something, just because it needed to change. still, they said nothing changed. finally i changed enough random shit that they said stuff had changed and it was ok to file. then the went and said we lied, you can't do this electronically, you have to file this one by traditional paper. pay us for our time. i went through the faqs and tried to figure out how to get it to work. no doing.
taxes are confusing to me. i don't know what all this needlessly complicated paperwork means. i don't know why everything is the way it is, or why it is so fucked up. basically, turbo tax screwed me out of $340, plus $40 in fees they said i never had to pay that i finally just paid because there was no way to get my refund otherwise because they had already started the filing process or whatever. so yeah. i need 20 of you to boycot turbo tax to make up for my fucking $400.
FUCK
i am so fucking pissed right now. i broke my chair and almost threw it through the window. i mean, i expect this kind of bait and FUCK YOU IN THE ASS type stuff from some jerk off company that sells used condoms or something, but not turbo tax. i mean, shit, doing your taxes is such a professional thing. they make tons of money off people like me who don't know what to do, so we go through them. they don't have the straight out LIE and STEAL from me. FUCK FUCK. THIS JUST PISSES THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME. i am so angry. like, road rage angry. it pisses the fuck out of me because there is ABSOLUTELY FUCK SHIT I CAN DO BECAUSE I AM JUST SOME ORDINARY JOE GETTING SCREWED ON SOMETHING AS INNOCENT AS TAXES. i am so fucking pissed. FUCKING PISSED
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
so, i went to do my taxes through this whole e-filing tax freedom thing. i did it, blah blah, they were like come back in 24 hours to complete it. it was all supposed to be free. the told me the entire time that there were no charges. NO CHARGES. i was like, yeehaw. so i went back today and logged in like they said. it came up with a thing that said you can't finish your return until you pay us. i was like WHAT THE FUCK. i tried to find their tech support, there is really jack shit in that category. they had a faq that said "why are you charging me if you said it was free." i went to there, went through every step, the last one was something like "log out and start over." so i did. now this is the fucking retarded part. when i went through it again, they already had all my stuff saved, so i just kind of clicked through. only this time, my refund was $340 more than they said the first time. i was like WOO HOO. but i get to the end, and they are like no, you already filed, pay us. you can't get your refund until you pay them. i was like wait a second, what about my extra money. then they were like, you have to do this other part, file an amendum or something. so i went to do that. i went through it all, and they said i couldn't do it because the information hadn't changed. I was like, NO FUCKING SHIT NOTHING CHANGED. but i went through, and changed something, just because it needed to change. still, they said nothing changed. finally i changed enough random shit that they said stuff had changed and it was ok to file. then the went and said we lied, you can't do this electronically, you have to file this one by traditional paper. pay us for our time. i went through the faqs and tried to figure out how to get it to work. no doing.
taxes are confusing to me. i don't know what all this needlessly complicated paperwork means. i don't know why everything is the way it is, or why it is so fucked up. basically, turbo tax screwed me out of $340, plus $40 in fees they said i never had to pay that i finally just paid because there was no way to get my refund otherwise because they had already started the filing process or whatever. so yeah. i need 20 of you to boycot turbo tax to make up for my fucking $400.
FUCK
i am so fucking pissed right now. i broke my chair and almost threw it through the window. i mean, i expect this kind of bait and FUCK YOU IN THE ASS type stuff from some jerk off company that sells used condoms or something, but not turbo tax. i mean, shit, doing your taxes is such a professional thing. they make tons of money off people like me who don't know what to do, so we go through them. they don't have the straight out LIE and STEAL from me. FUCK FUCK. THIS JUST PISSES THE LIVING SHIT OUT OF ME. i am so angry. like, road rage angry. it pisses the fuck out of me because there is ABSOLUTELY FUCK SHIT I CAN DO BECAUSE I AM JUST SOME ORDINARY JOE GETTING SCREWED ON SOMETHING AS INNOCENT AS TAXES. i am so fucking pissed. FUCKING PISSED
GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
Wednesday, February 12, 2003
ok, so yeah, look up wank in the dictionary at dictionary.com. if you scroll down a few entry's, and you get this
wank
/wangk/ [Columbia University: probably by mutation from
Commonwealth slang "wank", to masturbate] Used much as hack
is elsewhere, as a noun denoting a clever technique or person
or the result of such cleverness. May describe (negatively)
the act of hacking for hacking's sake ("Quit wanking, let's go
get supper!") or (more positively) a wizard. "wanky"
describes something particularly clever (a person, program, or
algorithm). Conversations can also get wanky when there are
too many wanks involved. This excess wankiness is signalled
by an overload of the "wankometer" (compare bogometer).
When the wankometer overloads, the conversation's subject must
be changed, or all non-wanks will leave. Compare
"neep-neeping" (under neep-neep). Usage: US only. In
Britain and the Commonwealth this word is *extremely* rude and
is best avoided unless one intends to give offense.
as you might expect, started cracking up. so, i was like this makes sense, and decided to investigate more. i clicked on the bogometer link, which led me to the bogosity site. bogosity had this to say:
bogosity
/boh-go's*-tee/ The degree to which something is "bogus" in
the hackish sense of "bad". At CMU, bogosity is measured with
a bogometer; in a seminar, when a speaker says something
bogus, a listener might raise his hand and say "My bogometer
just triggered". More extremely, "You just pinned my
bogometer" means you just said or did something so
outrageously bogus that it is off the scale, pinning the
bogometer needle at the highest possible reading (one might
also say "You just redlined my bogometer"). The agreed-upon
unit of bogosity is the microLenat.
Also, the potential field generated by a bogon flux; see
quantum bogodynamics. See also bogon flux, bogon
filter.
this struck me as curious, but in some wierd way made so much sense. i investigate a little more, and under microLenat came up with this:
microlenat
/mi:"-kroh-len"-*t/ The unit of bogosity, written uL; the
consensus is that this is the largest unit practical for
everyday use. The microLenat, originally invented by David
Jefferson, was promulgated as an attack against noted computer
scientist Doug Lenat by a tenured graduate student at
CMU. Doug had failed the student on an important exam for
giving only "AI is bogus" as his answer to the questions. The
slur is generally considered unmerited, but it has become a
running gag nevertheless. Some of Doug's friends argue that
*of course* a microLenat is bogus, since it is only one
millionth of a Lenat. Others have suggested that the unit
should be redesignated after the grad student, as the
microReid.
now, it is obvious that i need to find this grad student.
see, the bogon flux is what struck me as a strange theory, but after reading about it, it also makes a lot of sense, as can be shown by the definition here:
bogon flux
/boh'gon fluhks/ A measure of a supposed field of bogosity
emitted by a speaker, measured by a bogometer; as a speaker
starts to wander into increasing bogosity a listener might say
"Warning, warning, bogon flux is rising". See quantum
bogodynamics.
my curiosity had been piqued, i need to start studying the field of quantum bogodynamics.
quantum bogodynamics
/kwon'tm boh"goh-di:-nam"iks/ A theory that characterises the
universe in terms of bogon sources (such as politicians,
used-car salesmen, TV evangelists, and suits in general),
bogon sinks (such as taxpayers and computers), and bogosity
potential fields. Bogon absorption causes human beings to
behave mindlessly and machines to fail (and may also cause
both to emit secondary bogons); however, the precise mechanics
of bogon-computron interaction are not yet understood.
Quantum bogodynamics is most often invoked to explain the
sharp increase in hardware and software failures in the
presence of suits; the latter emit bogons, which the former
absorb.
suits are the obvious pervayors of such bogosity. fuck suits, i hate them too:
suit
n. 1. Ugly and uncomfortable `business clothing' often
worn by non-hackers. Invariably worn with a `tie', a strangulation
device that partially cuts off the blood supply to the brain. It is
thought that this explains much about the behavior of suit-wearers.
Compare droid. 2. A person who habitually wears suits, as
distinct from a techie or hacker. See pointy-haired, burble,
management, Stupids, SNAFU principle, PHB, and
brain-damaged.
anyways, the great thing is that i made none of this up. zilch, zero. i found it all in definitions on dictionary.com. go look it up for yourself. it is a surreal experience
wank
/wangk/ [Columbia University: probably by mutation from
Commonwealth slang "wank", to masturbate] Used much as hack
is elsewhere, as a noun denoting a clever technique or person
or the result of such cleverness. May describe (negatively)
the act of hacking for hacking's sake ("Quit wanking, let's go
get supper!") or (more positively) a wizard. "wanky"
describes something particularly clever (a person, program, or
algorithm). Conversations can also get wanky when there are
too many wanks involved. This excess wankiness is signalled
by an overload of the "wankometer" (compare bogometer).
When the wankometer overloads, the conversation's subject must
be changed, or all non-wanks will leave. Compare
"neep-neeping" (under neep-neep). Usage: US only. In
Britain and the Commonwealth this word is *extremely* rude and
is best avoided unless one intends to give offense.
as you might expect, started cracking up. so, i was like this makes sense, and decided to investigate more. i clicked on the bogometer link, which led me to the bogosity site. bogosity had this to say:
bogosity
/boh-go's*-tee/ The degree to which something is "bogus" in
the hackish sense of "bad". At CMU, bogosity is measured with
a bogometer; in a seminar, when a speaker says something
bogus, a listener might raise his hand and say "My bogometer
just triggered". More extremely, "You just pinned my
bogometer" means you just said or did something so
outrageously bogus that it is off the scale, pinning the
bogometer needle at the highest possible reading (one might
also say "You just redlined my bogometer"). The agreed-upon
unit of bogosity is the microLenat.
Also, the potential field generated by a bogon flux; see
quantum bogodynamics. See also bogon flux, bogon
filter.
this struck me as curious, but in some wierd way made so much sense. i investigate a little more, and under microLenat came up with this:
microlenat
/mi:"-kroh-len"-*t/ The unit of bogosity, written uL; the
consensus is that this is the largest unit practical for
everyday use. The microLenat, originally invented by David
Jefferson, was promulgated as an attack against noted computer
scientist Doug Lenat by a tenured graduate student at
CMU. Doug had failed the student on an important exam for
giving only "AI is bogus" as his answer to the questions. The
slur is generally considered unmerited, but it has become a
running gag nevertheless. Some of Doug's friends argue that
*of course* a microLenat is bogus, since it is only one
millionth of a Lenat. Others have suggested that the unit
should be redesignated after the grad student, as the
microReid.
now, it is obvious that i need to find this grad student.
see, the bogon flux is what struck me as a strange theory, but after reading about it, it also makes a lot of sense, as can be shown by the definition here:
bogon flux
/boh'gon fluhks/ A measure of a supposed field of bogosity
emitted by a speaker, measured by a bogometer; as a speaker
starts to wander into increasing bogosity a listener might say
"Warning, warning, bogon flux is rising". See quantum
bogodynamics.
my curiosity had been piqued, i need to start studying the field of quantum bogodynamics.
quantum bogodynamics
/kwon'tm boh"goh-di:-nam"iks/ A theory that characterises the
universe in terms of bogon sources (such as politicians,
used-car salesmen, TV evangelists, and suits in general),
bogon sinks (such as taxpayers and computers), and bogosity
potential fields. Bogon absorption causes human beings to
behave mindlessly and machines to fail (and may also cause
both to emit secondary bogons); however, the precise mechanics
of bogon-computron interaction are not yet understood.
Quantum bogodynamics is most often invoked to explain the
sharp increase in hardware and software failures in the
presence of suits; the latter emit bogons, which the former
absorb.
suits are the obvious pervayors of such bogosity. fuck suits, i hate them too:
suit
n. 1. Ugly and uncomfortable `business clothing' often
worn by non-hackers. Invariably worn with a `tie', a strangulation
device that partially cuts off the blood supply to the brain. It is
thought that this explains much about the behavior of suit-wearers.
Compare droid. 2. A person who habitually wears suits, as
distinct from a techie or hacker. See pointy-haired, burble,
management, Stupids, SNAFU principle, PHB, and
brain-damaged.
anyways, the great thing is that i made none of this up. zilch, zero. i found it all in definitions on dictionary.com. go look it up for yourself. it is a surreal experience
for the record, regarding that whole car pushing thing... i think chris was driving because the rest of us couldn't even walk straight. i am a retard though. we were going up a hill, and the car started rolling back, so i told him to brake, but everyone else pushed and it started up the hill again, i almost fucked us all over. thank you to chris for not listening to me because i suck :D
i shaved today. i left huge mutton chops, and a mustache. i had a soul patch, but i just shaved it off because i look better without it. i'm gonna shave the mutton chops off too because they are a little too rediculous, but it is still great. when i put my hair back in a pony tail i look like a child molester with these stupid sideburns :D they are pimpin beyond all belief, but i don't want to scare people away from me. with my long hair, full sideburns (just not huge chops) and my mustache, i look almost exactly like the guitarist guy from almost famous, and also a lot like mandy patinkin or whatever his name is, indigo montoya from princess bride. i wish i had a sword and some good swashbuckling clothes. now THAT would be pimpin
i shaved today. i left huge mutton chops, and a mustache. i had a soul patch, but i just shaved it off because i look better without it. i'm gonna shave the mutton chops off too because they are a little too rediculous, but it is still great. when i put my hair back in a pony tail i look like a child molester with these stupid sideburns :D they are pimpin beyond all belief, but i don't want to scare people away from me. with my long hair, full sideburns (just not huge chops) and my mustache, i look almost exactly like the guitarist guy from almost famous, and also a lot like mandy patinkin or whatever his name is, indigo montoya from princess bride. i wish i had a sword and some good swashbuckling clothes. now THAT would be pimpin
Monday, February 10, 2003
http://www.ihumpthings.com/
good to see someone out there is keeping it real, humpin style
so yeah, bellingham good, home also good....
i swear, there is something in the water up there that naturally reduces hangovers, because i was trashed, like literally TRASHED both nights, and i woke up feeling nothing at all. i had a harder time this morning after smoking a bowl last night. i envy that entire town
good to see someone out there is keeping it real, humpin style
so yeah, bellingham good, home also good....
i swear, there is something in the water up there that naturally reduces hangovers, because i was trashed, like literally TRASHED both nights, and i woke up feeling nothing at all. i had a harder time this morning after smoking a bowl last night. i envy that entire town
Sunday, February 09, 2003
Wednesday, February 05, 2003
i mean seriously, with the no writing thing. without work, what do i have to complain about? and without complaining, how do i start a blog? it is pretty damn funny over here in my camp. i just kind of sit around not doing anything, happily lazy. then i'm like, i'm not doing anything, i should blog!!!! look, judge mathis is on!!!!! and then i watch judge mathis. if i want to lay around and watch judge mathis, i can. oh yeah, and me and matt went to the gap in u-villiage. THAT is a funny place. you walk in, and there is like this 2 story tall picture of some gap dude. i looked up and said to myself "damn, how cool would it be to walk into a room and see a 30 foot tall picture of YOU." i would stand next to it all day grinning waiting for the ladies to come up and hand me the keys to their cars/houses. it would happen, i mean jeebus, i'd be a gap model. thats a wierd place. i don't think i'd been in a gap in about 10 years, not much has changed. they have the little corner near the entrance for the mens clothing thats all walled off to keep the guys contained so the girls can enjoy their spacious shopping paradise in peace. the mens department was about the size of our apartment, which is subsequently very small. matt bought stuff while i kind of walked in circles. when we went to the cashier, i felt so out of place. i mean, i'm seriously out of my element there. the cashier looked at what matt was buying and said "shabby, but not too shabby." i was thinking to myself, this is the most expensive outfit i've ever seen anyone buy, and its a freaking sweatshirt and warmup pants, shabby my ass! one of those racks costs more than everything i own. it was a little bit disconcerting. i mean, i don't know what the hip fly gear is today, but everyone seems to have gap or abercrombie or something like that. how can people even afford to buy clothes period? spending 20 bucks on some underwear was a huge thing for me. i don't have money to buy clothes, even when i'm rich. i just can't afford them.
Monday, February 03, 2003
the worst thing is, it probably isn't even kazaa screwing us over. ATT SUCKs BLAH. crap, our internet is just screwed to all hell. i can't even cruise the net. luckily, judge mathis has my back
so bitter, so much angst, damn that rap music!!!!
the real reason i'm filled with so much anger, i've started revisiting an old addiction. yes, thats right, dark age of camelot. i can play this game a lot, but i can't play this game if i have other things to do. i just can't anymore. so i get up early to play it because i know matt won't wake up until 4. while he is wanking around in the morning doing his whole wake up deal, i can still play, so this gives me 5 or 6 hours each day of pure unadulturated camelot time. which is perfect, it is glorious, it fills the time and my need for gaming very well. its not like kazaa always jacks so much crap. but when it is actually doing stuff, i can't play dark age of camelot. it is impossible. like, the game crashes if you don't have enough bandwidth to support it. and right now, matt's kazaa is downloading stuff, and probably uploading stuff to other people. that is the real killer. cable gives everyone this crappy upload speed, so if someone is jacking it all, you are dead. death, oh painful death. my midget needs me!!!!!! she needs levels........... BAH THE PAIN
the real reason i'm filled with so much anger, i've started revisiting an old addiction. yes, thats right, dark age of camelot. i can play this game a lot, but i can't play this game if i have other things to do. i just can't anymore. so i get up early to play it because i know matt won't wake up until 4. while he is wanking around in the morning doing his whole wake up deal, i can still play, so this gives me 5 or 6 hours each day of pure unadulturated camelot time. which is perfect, it is glorious, it fills the time and my need for gaming very well. its not like kazaa always jacks so much crap. but when it is actually doing stuff, i can't play dark age of camelot. it is impossible. like, the game crashes if you don't have enough bandwidth to support it. and right now, matt's kazaa is downloading stuff, and probably uploading stuff to other people. that is the real killer. cable gives everyone this crappy upload speed, so if someone is jacking it all, you are dead. death, oh painful death. my midget needs me!!!!!! she needs levels........... BAH THE PAIN
fuck this. i really really hate kazaa all the time. if anyone has it on in the house you live in, the rest of the internet if fucking SHOT. you can't use it, you can't use it at all. like, i'm back to 14.4 speed on webpages here. there is nothing i can complain about besides the fact that kazaa is a bandwidth whore of a program that is programmed to eat any and all bandwidth and processing resourses it may think it needs. it pisses me off because i need kazaa to get stuff, but while i'm getting stuff i can't do anything else. and when you add the fact that matt needs it to get stuff, and i while he is doing it, we also can't use the computer for internet stuff. but WE NEED THAT STUFF!!!!! i mean shit, we can't stop getting stuff. kazaa just needs to back down and not jack everything.
Sunday, February 02, 2003
