Wednesday, July 31, 2002
as i sit here listening to mexican death techno, i wonder.....
why the hell am i doing this.
this reminds me, that i don't know why the hell i do a lot of things anymore. the whole work thing. work makes no sense. i don't really know why i go, at all. i mean, seriously, why bother. WHY WORK
ok time makes no sense. it is true, time has absolutely no consistancy. i am convinced that a second is not always a second. and more importantly, 8 hours is definitely not always the same 8 hours. ok, tuesday, longest freaking day of my life. why? because it was so hated. it was so hated and it didn't even know it. so today was pretty damn normal, but it felt like it flew because tuesday was so damn slow. so damn slow and hated.......
this has been such a non week. i don't feel like i'm doing anything important. the funny thing is, i managed to get more done today that i think i have ever been able too. its not like i worked any harder or was any more motivated, things just got done. this goes along with the whole time makes no sense thing. i mean seriously, it was just fucking wierd the way it happened. i got to the office, started working, bloop bloop, got stuff done, looked at the time, like no time had gone past. NO SENSE!!! NO SENSE I TELL YOU.
there is something wierd about the space bar key on my new keyboard. it doesn't work as well as i would like it too, it kind of sticks. usually its pretty good, but sometimes it seems like its really bad.
AMMMOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKK (spanish for '666 is the greatest mexican techno act ever')
too much of my life is dedicated to playing this silly video game. i play it all the time. i give it a higher priority than just about anything else. but when i'm not playing and just kind of sitting around, i'm freaking bored. why wouldn't i play it? it makes me happy and unbored to play it. frlakjds;fkasd
i want to write a novel, like a real one. that would be sweet.
shit, i need to do stuff for a second. be back later
why the hell am i doing this.
this reminds me, that i don't know why the hell i do a lot of things anymore. the whole work thing. work makes no sense. i don't really know why i go, at all. i mean, seriously, why bother. WHY WORK
ok time makes no sense. it is true, time has absolutely no consistancy. i am convinced that a second is not always a second. and more importantly, 8 hours is definitely not always the same 8 hours. ok, tuesday, longest freaking day of my life. why? because it was so hated. it was so hated and it didn't even know it. so today was pretty damn normal, but it felt like it flew because tuesday was so damn slow. so damn slow and hated.......
this has been such a non week. i don't feel like i'm doing anything important. the funny thing is, i managed to get more done today that i think i have ever been able too. its not like i worked any harder or was any more motivated, things just got done. this goes along with the whole time makes no sense thing. i mean seriously, it was just fucking wierd the way it happened. i got to the office, started working, bloop bloop, got stuff done, looked at the time, like no time had gone past. NO SENSE!!! NO SENSE I TELL YOU.
there is something wierd about the space bar key on my new keyboard. it doesn't work as well as i would like it too, it kind of sticks. usually its pretty good, but sometimes it seems like its really bad.
AMMMOOOOOOOOKKKKKKKKK (spanish for '666 is the greatest mexican techno act ever')
too much of my life is dedicated to playing this silly video game. i play it all the time. i give it a higher priority than just about anything else. but when i'm not playing and just kind of sitting around, i'm freaking bored. why wouldn't i play it? it makes me happy and unbored to play it. frlakjds;fkasd
i want to write a novel, like a real one. that would be sweet.
shit, i need to do stuff for a second. be back later
Friday, July 26, 2002
ok, i read through that whole thing, and it wasn't coherent in the slightest. i sound like a monkey trying to explain quantum physics to a 4 year old... it just didn't work. i mean even if the monkey understood the theory in the first place, he wouldn't be able to break it down into terms the 4 year old would understand. and even if he could, he is a fucking monkey and can't talk anyways.
i don't think you are a 4 year old, and you may understand this whole quantum physics thing, sure. but i'm still a monkey
i don't think you are a 4 year old, and you may understand this whole quantum physics thing, sure. but i'm still a monkey
so, what would be cooler than getting pimpslapped by morgan freeman?
man oh man what a stupid week, hahahhaa. seriously this week has made no sense. i just don't get it. time seems to fly one day, then DEATH the next day. right now i just want to go home. but i can't. crap monkeys.
something thats been bugging me for a while... its on the whole subject of absolutes, and how i don't believe they exist. every time i start thinking about how absolutes can't exist, i remember that the complete lack of existance orf absolutes is in itself an absolute, basically blowing the whole theory and rocking my belief system to its core. so recently i've been puzzling my way through this. it was really bugging me, but i think i have it figured out. the theory that there are no absolutes still holds true, as long as the fact that there are no absolutes is an absolute. ok, this is getting tricky to explain. see, the fact that their are no absolutes is an absolute. the fact that this is the only absolute makes the theory hold true. but because the theory itself is the only example of when the theory could possibly be wrong, it leaves no room for the existance of other absolutes.
did that make any sense at all? it is really hard to put a thought process down into words. but there it is, my attempt. i've puzzled it out and satisfied myself. i can still have this belief and not be raping my mind by believing in it at the same time.
good god my mind is all over today. i can't concentrate on one thing. i need to go. just go somewhere. like home, sit down in front of my comfortabel computer in my nice chair. oh, it sounds grand........
man oh man what a stupid week, hahahhaa. seriously this week has made no sense. i just don't get it. time seems to fly one day, then DEATH the next day. right now i just want to go home. but i can't. crap monkeys.
something thats been bugging me for a while... its on the whole subject of absolutes, and how i don't believe they exist. every time i start thinking about how absolutes can't exist, i remember that the complete lack of existance orf absolutes is in itself an absolute, basically blowing the whole theory and rocking my belief system to its core. so recently i've been puzzling my way through this. it was really bugging me, but i think i have it figured out. the theory that there are no absolutes still holds true, as long as the fact that there are no absolutes is an absolute. ok, this is getting tricky to explain. see, the fact that their are no absolutes is an absolute. the fact that this is the only absolute makes the theory hold true. but because the theory itself is the only example of when the theory could possibly be wrong, it leaves no room for the existance of other absolutes.
did that make any sense at all? it is really hard to put a thought process down into words. but there it is, my attempt. i've puzzled it out and satisfied myself. i can still have this belief and not be raping my mind by believing in it at the same time.
good god my mind is all over today. i can't concentrate on one thing. i need to go. just go somewhere. like home, sit down in front of my comfortabel computer in my nice chair. oh, it sounds grand........
Tuesday, July 23, 2002
god, i can hear the freaking crickets. my webpage hates me, because i don't update it...
bleh, time for a sober blog, its been too long.
my thought process has completely stopped. i don't really know why. its just like in the past few months, i haven't been doing anything, and my brain has decided to take a vacation. i need something to kickstart it, because its been lonely in here without myself to talk too...
ryan mentioned something a while ago that i've been thinking about a lot lately. its on the whole subject of caring. there is a huge difference between being bitter and just being jaded. i may have talked about this before, but i'm going off on it again. i mean, for a long time i thought i was bitter, because i thought all jaded people were inherently bitter. i mean, they kind of go hand in hand. but then ryan said, you aren't bitter, you have to care to be bitter. and then it was one of those zen like moments where both of us just kind of stood there. in fact, i'm not even sure who said it. maybe it was me who said it to him. anyways, one of us blurted out these words without really thinking, and then we just kind of stood there for a second with this giddy sense of realization. i dunno, its changed the way i think a lot. i used to think i was bitter, but now i know i'm just jaded. whenever i am feeling bitter, i remind myself (or ryan reminds me) that i don't have to care. then i'm content and happy.
well, happy to a certain degree... why does everyone always strive to be happy? i don't think anyone is striving for complete happiness all the time. i mean, if you were truely happy all the time you would kill yourself. it would be maddening. i think what most people who are striving for happiness are truely striving for the a complete lack of emotion. i mean, if you are completely neutral, you will always be at least content, if not happy. no one can be happy all the time. its just not possible. so when people are saying, i just want to be happy in life, people are really saying i just want to have a few seconds to myself where i don't have to feel.
people will argue that happiness is the opposite of things like anger and depression and such. people just assume that once they pull themselves out of depression, they will be happy. happiness and depression aren't absolutes though. i mean, nothing is really an absolute. once you pull yourself out of depression, you reach that sense of normalcy that people refer too as happiness. but it isn't really happiness. happiness is a complete different emotion. you can be happy for a while, but you can't be happy all the time. everyone comes down off that happy high back into an emotionless state for at least a moment. i guess i seek neutrality.
there is something fascinating about balance. people always seem to want something to be one way or the other. i want things to be right in between. the world needs balance.... ok i'm sounding cliche and borderline hippyish here, but oh well. actually not really hippyish at all. what do i sound like. fucked, don't know don't care. i sound wierd... alright...
anyways, i want to seek a balance in life. i don't like things to be at extremes all the time. the constant shift makes me queasy. i mean, if you are right in the center of the emotional spectrum, you have so much more flexibility. i mean, you have the ability to love, hate, like, dislike, be happy, be sad, etc etc etc all at the same time. if you are like really sad, and something good happens, all that can really happen is to feel a little less sad. but whatever. balance is great.
maybe this is why work pisses me off so much. there is not enough balance between the weekday and weekend. its like, work screws up 5 entire days, because even when you aren't at work you are tired from work, or holding back because you have to wake up for work the next day. and in reality, this also screws up friday and monday, so the only real day you have to let loose is saturday. thats one day out of seven. i want 3 days out of 7 at least. cripes...
this past friday, i went out with some of my current and ex-coworkers for a few beers. actually, i don't think we went out for a few beers, but that ended up being my purpose for being there. we were talking about girls and relationships and stuff, and someone said i was innocent. i don't know that i would call myself innocent. i definitely have innocent moments, and i definitely give off sort of an innocent aura at times, but i think that i am better off than most guys. i mean, how long have i been working for starflower, 2 something years. through this time, most of my coworkers and even the contract labor we get have been females between the ages of 18-27. what do they talk about? their relationships, guys, other girls, you know, standard fare. i've weaseled my way into their little sphere of comfort, so they seem to talk relatively freely and at times really really want to give out advice. i don't really have much to offer back, so i just kind of absorb information. i'm like this huge estrogen sponge or something, just waiting to be wrung out on some unsuspecting girl. its also made me realize a lot about myself, and what type of person i am as compared what type of person i want to be, and more importantly how to begin to be the person i want to be. i think i have changed a lot in the past 2 years. i think anyone who knew me before starflower wouldn't recognize me now, and not just because i have long hair.
one thing i have realized, is that i have pretty high standards when it comes to women. there is absolutely nothing wrong with having high standards as long as you don't mind being alone a lot, which i don't. in fact, i kind of enjoy being alone. i'm sure there will be a day where i am starving for a female presence, but right now i really don't care. its wierd, because it seems like not too long ago i was all whiney because i didn't have a girlfriend. that was stupid, and i don't know why i did that anymore.
anyways, back to this whole beer with coworkers thing. i had a lot of fun. i didn't mean to drink as much as i did, but oh well. i'm a fan of being drunk, i just felt strange being drunk around my coworkers. i really doubt they cared in the slightest. in fact, i think all of us drank a little more than we had expected. but anyways, it was a strange situation, almost like the first few times i drank around my parents. i mean, not that bad, but that same sort of feeling you know? it was really funny, because when i was stoned sunday night, i got really really paranoid that everyone was going to hate me because i was drunk on friday, and that i was going to show up and everyone was going to be mad at me, and look down on me. i was especially afraid that my favorite ex-coworker was going to have spread all these nasty stories about what a scary alcoholic i was and how i almost killed her on the drive home on multiple occasions. i kind of missed a driveway and backed into a curb when i was turning around getting out of my parking spot near the bar. my shocks are bad to begin with, so it probably seemed a lot worse that it was, but apparently it was something to be embarassed about. the embarassing thing is, the combination of drinking before the event and drinking after the event made the details about it a little fuzzy, and i didn't even really remember until ryan told me about it the next day. my car was acting stupid on sunday when i drove it again for the first time since the incident, and i was all scared i had done something to my car. but now its driving the same, and it was only the engine protesting how hot it was outside. my shock is still making the same creaking sound it was before i did this, so that sucks. in hindsight, maybe i should have hit the damn curb harder to try and knock the shock back into place and stop the creaking. because its really damn annoying....
i guess what i'm trying to say is that i always think i'm much cooler than i am when i'm drunk (imagine that). i mean, i think i am a pretty swankin drunk guy, as long as you are drunk too. i probably seem like a buffoon if you aren't, but thats the way it is with everyone. drunk people need to stick together, it makes it a lot more fun for everyone.
sometimes i wonder if i am an alcoholic, because i drink so much. its not even that i drink a lot, its that i drink often. i'm not an alcoholic in a bad sense. i enjoy drinking. i derive pleasure from it. when it stops being fun, but i still keep doing it, and doing it in excess, thats when i will really be an alcoholic. alcoholism is a wierd thing, because alcohol isn't naturally addictive like cigarettes or heroine or stuff like that. its more of a mental addiction. i still don't think i'm at the point where i am an alcoholic. i don't think i'm capable of becoming mentally addicted to anything, i'm too lazy and have too short of an attention span. i've said it before, but i wish i could be addicted to something, just to know what it feels like. i think it would be kind of an interesting experience.
well, i want to write more, but i have to go home, and it sucks, because i know i'm not going to write when i get there. so this is going to have to be it for a while. hopefully not that long..... i really missed blogging...
bleh, time for a sober blog, its been too long.
my thought process has completely stopped. i don't really know why. its just like in the past few months, i haven't been doing anything, and my brain has decided to take a vacation. i need something to kickstart it, because its been lonely in here without myself to talk too...
ryan mentioned something a while ago that i've been thinking about a lot lately. its on the whole subject of caring. there is a huge difference between being bitter and just being jaded. i may have talked about this before, but i'm going off on it again. i mean, for a long time i thought i was bitter, because i thought all jaded people were inherently bitter. i mean, they kind of go hand in hand. but then ryan said, you aren't bitter, you have to care to be bitter. and then it was one of those zen like moments where both of us just kind of stood there. in fact, i'm not even sure who said it. maybe it was me who said it to him. anyways, one of us blurted out these words without really thinking, and then we just kind of stood there for a second with this giddy sense of realization. i dunno, its changed the way i think a lot. i used to think i was bitter, but now i know i'm just jaded. whenever i am feeling bitter, i remind myself (or ryan reminds me) that i don't have to care. then i'm content and happy.
well, happy to a certain degree... why does everyone always strive to be happy? i don't think anyone is striving for complete happiness all the time. i mean, if you were truely happy all the time you would kill yourself. it would be maddening. i think what most people who are striving for happiness are truely striving for the a complete lack of emotion. i mean, if you are completely neutral, you will always be at least content, if not happy. no one can be happy all the time. its just not possible. so when people are saying, i just want to be happy in life, people are really saying i just want to have a few seconds to myself where i don't have to feel.
people will argue that happiness is the opposite of things like anger and depression and such. people just assume that once they pull themselves out of depression, they will be happy. happiness and depression aren't absolutes though. i mean, nothing is really an absolute. once you pull yourself out of depression, you reach that sense of normalcy that people refer too as happiness. but it isn't really happiness. happiness is a complete different emotion. you can be happy for a while, but you can't be happy all the time. everyone comes down off that happy high back into an emotionless state for at least a moment. i guess i seek neutrality.
there is something fascinating about balance. people always seem to want something to be one way or the other. i want things to be right in between. the world needs balance.... ok i'm sounding cliche and borderline hippyish here, but oh well. actually not really hippyish at all. what do i sound like. fucked, don't know don't care. i sound wierd... alright...
anyways, i want to seek a balance in life. i don't like things to be at extremes all the time. the constant shift makes me queasy. i mean, if you are right in the center of the emotional spectrum, you have so much more flexibility. i mean, you have the ability to love, hate, like, dislike, be happy, be sad, etc etc etc all at the same time. if you are like really sad, and something good happens, all that can really happen is to feel a little less sad. but whatever. balance is great.
maybe this is why work pisses me off so much. there is not enough balance between the weekday and weekend. its like, work screws up 5 entire days, because even when you aren't at work you are tired from work, or holding back because you have to wake up for work the next day. and in reality, this also screws up friday and monday, so the only real day you have to let loose is saturday. thats one day out of seven. i want 3 days out of 7 at least. cripes...
this past friday, i went out with some of my current and ex-coworkers for a few beers. actually, i don't think we went out for a few beers, but that ended up being my purpose for being there. we were talking about girls and relationships and stuff, and someone said i was innocent. i don't know that i would call myself innocent. i definitely have innocent moments, and i definitely give off sort of an innocent aura at times, but i think that i am better off than most guys. i mean, how long have i been working for starflower, 2 something years. through this time, most of my coworkers and even the contract labor we get have been females between the ages of 18-27. what do they talk about? their relationships, guys, other girls, you know, standard fare. i've weaseled my way into their little sphere of comfort, so they seem to talk relatively freely and at times really really want to give out advice. i don't really have much to offer back, so i just kind of absorb information. i'm like this huge estrogen sponge or something, just waiting to be wrung out on some unsuspecting girl. its also made me realize a lot about myself, and what type of person i am as compared what type of person i want to be, and more importantly how to begin to be the person i want to be. i think i have changed a lot in the past 2 years. i think anyone who knew me before starflower wouldn't recognize me now, and not just because i have long hair.
one thing i have realized, is that i have pretty high standards when it comes to women. there is absolutely nothing wrong with having high standards as long as you don't mind being alone a lot, which i don't. in fact, i kind of enjoy being alone. i'm sure there will be a day where i am starving for a female presence, but right now i really don't care. its wierd, because it seems like not too long ago i was all whiney because i didn't have a girlfriend. that was stupid, and i don't know why i did that anymore.
anyways, back to this whole beer with coworkers thing. i had a lot of fun. i didn't mean to drink as much as i did, but oh well. i'm a fan of being drunk, i just felt strange being drunk around my coworkers. i really doubt they cared in the slightest. in fact, i think all of us drank a little more than we had expected. but anyways, it was a strange situation, almost like the first few times i drank around my parents. i mean, not that bad, but that same sort of feeling you know? it was really funny, because when i was stoned sunday night, i got really really paranoid that everyone was going to hate me because i was drunk on friday, and that i was going to show up and everyone was going to be mad at me, and look down on me. i was especially afraid that my favorite ex-coworker was going to have spread all these nasty stories about what a scary alcoholic i was and how i almost killed her on the drive home on multiple occasions. i kind of missed a driveway and backed into a curb when i was turning around getting out of my parking spot near the bar. my shocks are bad to begin with, so it probably seemed a lot worse that it was, but apparently it was something to be embarassed about. the embarassing thing is, the combination of drinking before the event and drinking after the event made the details about it a little fuzzy, and i didn't even really remember until ryan told me about it the next day. my car was acting stupid on sunday when i drove it again for the first time since the incident, and i was all scared i had done something to my car. but now its driving the same, and it was only the engine protesting how hot it was outside. my shock is still making the same creaking sound it was before i did this, so that sucks. in hindsight, maybe i should have hit the damn curb harder to try and knock the shock back into place and stop the creaking. because its really damn annoying....
i guess what i'm trying to say is that i always think i'm much cooler than i am when i'm drunk (imagine that). i mean, i think i am a pretty swankin drunk guy, as long as you are drunk too. i probably seem like a buffoon if you aren't, but thats the way it is with everyone. drunk people need to stick together, it makes it a lot more fun for everyone.
sometimes i wonder if i am an alcoholic, because i drink so much. its not even that i drink a lot, its that i drink often. i'm not an alcoholic in a bad sense. i enjoy drinking. i derive pleasure from it. when it stops being fun, but i still keep doing it, and doing it in excess, thats when i will really be an alcoholic. alcoholism is a wierd thing, because alcohol isn't naturally addictive like cigarettes or heroine or stuff like that. its more of a mental addiction. i still don't think i'm at the point where i am an alcoholic. i don't think i'm capable of becoming mentally addicted to anything, i'm too lazy and have too short of an attention span. i've said it before, but i wish i could be addicted to something, just to know what it feels like. i think it would be kind of an interesting experience.
well, i want to write more, but i have to go home, and it sucks, because i know i'm not going to write when i get there. so this is going to have to be it for a while. hopefully not that long..... i really missed blogging...
Sunday, July 14, 2002
inspiration striking
the music pulsing, it is difficult to tell where the music stops and i begin. it doesn't really matter what the music is, just the way it feels.
words do not give thoughts justice.
the music pulsing, it is difficult to tell where the music stops and i begin. it doesn't really matter what the music is, just the way it feels.
words do not give thoughts justice.
Thursday, July 11, 2002
doo doo doo ,woo its all happenin with the mothamotha frappenin with the supa dupa crappenin with the shizzlenozzle nappetin.
NAPKIN PANTS MAKE ME DANCE BUT NOT IN FRANCE!!!
you know at first glace that seemed askance
but jim jamma stimpy staaaaamps
yo yo mah shizzles hows yo nizzles dizzling this evizziling.
bhshnizzle and rphizzoh spark the jizzzzzoooo
GOOD GOD I HAVE JUST BEEN REMINDED don't forget your damn TOWELLLL~~~~ towel to the shiznowwwwleeeaaah
weeeeeeahhhhahhaaaaaaaaaa
so when you dizzing in the dizzo with the mizzahizza shizzo, remember the deallio with the wizzanizzakizzooo
NAPKIN PANTS MAKE ME DANCE BUT NOT IN FRANCE!!!
you know at first glace that seemed askance
but jim jamma stimpy staaaaamps
yo yo mah shizzles hows yo nizzles dizzling this evizziling.
bhshnizzle and rphizzoh spark the jizzzzzoooo
GOOD GOD I HAVE JUST BEEN REMINDED don't forget your damn TOWELLLL~~~~ towel to the shiznowwwwleeeaaah
weeeeeeahhhhahhaaaaaaaaaa
so when you dizzing in the dizzo with the mizzahizza shizzo, remember the deallio with the wizzanizzakizzooo
Tuesday, July 09, 2002
alright, i have been informed by a very reliable jing that it is blogging time
i am a little skeptical you see, seeing as i should go to bed and all and my mind is jumping around like 3 rabbits on nose rocks. so yeah
anyways, i was on hold all day today. like, at work, at home, all over i was on hold and listening to the stupid damn music thats like, doo doo doododdodo, and you are like SHUT UP!!!! so finally i was talking to this really hot chick (you know she was) from the insurance place, and she had to put me on hold and she asked if i wanted music and i was like NO THANKS! and she was like great! then she put me on hold. our relationship lasted about a minute and a half before she put me in my place.
the moral of the story is, its hard to hold a long distance relationship inspired by musak when you are deaf
blah woo ok, the hotel from the lan party billed me twice. girls gone wild videos has their freaking cancellation number disconnected, so you can't call and stop them from sending me shit. i can cancel the account by sending the damn videos back but they mysteriously always end up open or something at the other house :D so yeah, money blows, especially when it is leaving for stupid reasons. its like, i'm packing my bags and going to canada. and you are like, what the hell, who goes to canada anyawys.
french words are stupid, especially other words that come from them, like cabbage. what kind of stupid word is that, and why is it french. thats just stupid. i mean really. french canadians are really annoying, because they are. we should send quebec to space on one of those carbon cable bucky string elevators and then pretend to forget we sent them up there. even though montreal has good strip clubs. thats a good reason to like canada. i mean, everyone loves strippers. a strip club can make anywhere desireable to some one. i bet mounties like it, i mean mounties. strippers, mounties, i wonder where they make their money. strippers probably have to bribe mounties with sexual favors to strip and stuff. i bet one girl did it with a horse or something, and thtas why they ride horses now because they are weird beastiophillic perverts. is beastiophillic a word? oh well, it sounds sophistimacated.
i mean really, if you have big melons and ride a horse, i bet cops would pay you for stuff even. even if you didn't ride a horse, i would pay you for stuff, and i'm not even a cop. jeez, sometimes i wish i could just like, steal a person. like, just go up and say you coming with me. not like kids or stuff, because thats kidnapping, but takign a person. they would probably just be like ok, sounds good. then they would just kind of chill and do stuff for you, i know it. i mean, really, what else do they have to do. it would be like getting a free personal assistant. i hope the person i steal ends up being a hot slutty girl. i mean, it would be ass to steal some hairy guy or something. this idea isn't sounding so good anymore. especially if the girl doesn't warm up to the whole sex slave deal. or if it was a hairy guy. thats like 2 bad reasons, and i listed like 1 good reason. the odds are against me. i better not do it.
gatorade rocks. you can carry it with a belt. you just wrap it around and drag it, it works pretty good. i did it with a bottle of gatorade and some snapple. i'd reccomend it if you ever need to carry some stuff and you are too lazy. just whip out the belt pootie tang style (and don't hit matt) and wrap it all up. its got you covered like a jimmy hat.
has anyone ever heard of the term mushroom goblin, or did i just make that up?
werd, peace out, flipside, check you later etc
i am a little skeptical you see, seeing as i should go to bed and all and my mind is jumping around like 3 rabbits on nose rocks. so yeah
anyways, i was on hold all day today. like, at work, at home, all over i was on hold and listening to the stupid damn music thats like, doo doo doododdodo, and you are like SHUT UP!!!! so finally i was talking to this really hot chick (you know she was) from the insurance place, and she had to put me on hold and she asked if i wanted music and i was like NO THANKS! and she was like great! then she put me on hold. our relationship lasted about a minute and a half before she put me in my place.
the moral of the story is, its hard to hold a long distance relationship inspired by musak when you are deaf
blah woo ok, the hotel from the lan party billed me twice. girls gone wild videos has their freaking cancellation number disconnected, so you can't call and stop them from sending me shit. i can cancel the account by sending the damn videos back but they mysteriously always end up open or something at the other house :D so yeah, money blows, especially when it is leaving for stupid reasons. its like, i'm packing my bags and going to canada. and you are like, what the hell, who goes to canada anyawys.
french words are stupid, especially other words that come from them, like cabbage. what kind of stupid word is that, and why is it french. thats just stupid. i mean really. french canadians are really annoying, because they are. we should send quebec to space on one of those carbon cable bucky string elevators and then pretend to forget we sent them up there. even though montreal has good strip clubs. thats a good reason to like canada. i mean, everyone loves strippers. a strip club can make anywhere desireable to some one. i bet mounties like it, i mean mounties. strippers, mounties, i wonder where they make their money. strippers probably have to bribe mounties with sexual favors to strip and stuff. i bet one girl did it with a horse or something, and thtas why they ride horses now because they are weird beastiophillic perverts. is beastiophillic a word? oh well, it sounds sophistimacated.
i mean really, if you have big melons and ride a horse, i bet cops would pay you for stuff even. even if you didn't ride a horse, i would pay you for stuff, and i'm not even a cop. jeez, sometimes i wish i could just like, steal a person. like, just go up and say you coming with me. not like kids or stuff, because thats kidnapping, but takign a person. they would probably just be like ok, sounds good. then they would just kind of chill and do stuff for you, i know it. i mean, really, what else do they have to do. it would be like getting a free personal assistant. i hope the person i steal ends up being a hot slutty girl. i mean, it would be ass to steal some hairy guy or something. this idea isn't sounding so good anymore. especially if the girl doesn't warm up to the whole sex slave deal. or if it was a hairy guy. thats like 2 bad reasons, and i listed like 1 good reason. the odds are against me. i better not do it.
gatorade rocks. you can carry it with a belt. you just wrap it around and drag it, it works pretty good. i did it with a bottle of gatorade and some snapple. i'd reccomend it if you ever need to carry some stuff and you are too lazy. just whip out the belt pootie tang style (and don't hit matt) and wrap it all up. its got you covered like a jimmy hat.
has anyone ever heard of the term mushroom goblin, or did i just make that up?
werd, peace out, flipside, check you later etc
Monday, July 08, 2002
Tuesday, July 02, 2002
so, yeah, wierd double blogging hoo hah should be corrected...
good god sir, another weekend gone, and another week almost half over. its freaking july. wtf!!! jeebus, its scary. time is a wacky wacky concept that i don't think anyone will ever be able to understand ever.... especially not me. i mean, i consider myself to be one of the smartest men alive, merely because people don't understand what i'm talking about a lot. i mean, if they don't understand, that must make me smart. its beautiful, i mean think about it. anyways, in my mind, in my world and mindset, i am one of the smartest men alive. ok, when you REALLY think about that, its sad that i'm not the smartest, because like no one is crazy enough to think like me. maybe some monkey is out there who thinks like me, and he's smarter than me or something....
people always say geniuses are always misunderstood in their own time. i thought about this for a while, and thought, wow, i'm a genius. then i got to thinking, there are a whole wankload of morons who are misunderstood ALL the time because they are just morons. i think most people who think they are just misunderstood geniuses are really morons. and i think most morons understand they are morons, which makes these self proclaimed misunderstood genius a whole level of idiot. i don't think i'm a misunderstood genius. i mean, i think most people understand that i'm a genius. they just don't understand how i can be so damn cool. damn straight. who cares if i'm a moron. i'm a genius in my own eyes :D
ohhhh dear, how my mind is leaving me. it is a wonderful thing. i was so out of it this morning, and it was so worth it, for i have a new love. it comes in edible form, and doesn't require any damn smoking at all.
anyways... there is this girl that has been working for us. she cracks me up. she always manages to dress nicely, even though she's outside in the dirt with the rest of us. i'm all nasty and grungy, haven't washed my clothes in however long, and she has some cute little shirt with matching pants and sunglasses on. i think its just hilarious, because it makes no sense whatsoever, but some how she manages it. its just crazy. like, today she was wearing this cowboy hat thing. in the words of ryan, it was rad, just because it was rediculous, yet it made sense at the same time. seriously, its awesome...
my life has been taken over by this damn game. i'm trying to cut back. i didn't play last night, like at all. today i played for a little bit and i'm not playing anymore. thats a flat out lie, but at least i'm not playing for 8 hours straight. i'll take some time to not play here, because its better that way.
OH OH OH GOD HOW COULD I FORGET. raddest thing i've seen ever. me and matt go to safeway while waiting for our teriyaki. and omg, 12 gatorades for like 8 dollars. we scoured the store, and found 12 kinds we could get and enjoy. matt snagged a basket like the genius he is.... oh baby, so much gatorade, its beautiful. the guy at the counter was like, you know, you didn't have to get 12, they are on sale no matter how many you get. we were like, sorry guy we don't work that way. and its true. how could we get less than 12? that wouldn't make any damn sense at all. i mean seriously, i couldn't do that. that would be like cheating on gatorade. it would just get the shaft. and i can't do that to something i love as much as gatorade.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaah, ryan needs to get back, because he does... i mean shiot, ryan. having him not here already for like 2 damn weeks or whatever, not fair. its like putting a leash on a dog, then just hanging it on the door knob and wandering off, its just cruel. so now i have energy and such, but he's not going to be here, ever. EVER. shnikes
btw, ryan is so right, gatorade fierce tastes like jello melted down.
jing had a point, but he left in in his car. i had a rational brainpattern but i left it in vermont. i've never been to vermont.
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh BWAH BWAAAAAAAAAAAH
i'm so losing it. i feel like i have something to say, its just not coming. its kind of beautiful in a lazy sort of way.
so.... here i am, kind of dribbling out... realizing that i don't have anything to say anyways. peace out on the flipside
good god sir, another weekend gone, and another week almost half over. its freaking july. wtf!!! jeebus, its scary. time is a wacky wacky concept that i don't think anyone will ever be able to understand ever.... especially not me. i mean, i consider myself to be one of the smartest men alive, merely because people don't understand what i'm talking about a lot. i mean, if they don't understand, that must make me smart. its beautiful, i mean think about it. anyways, in my mind, in my world and mindset, i am one of the smartest men alive. ok, when you REALLY think about that, its sad that i'm not the smartest, because like no one is crazy enough to think like me. maybe some monkey is out there who thinks like me, and he's smarter than me or something....
people always say geniuses are always misunderstood in their own time. i thought about this for a while, and thought, wow, i'm a genius. then i got to thinking, there are a whole wankload of morons who are misunderstood ALL the time because they are just morons. i think most people who think they are just misunderstood geniuses are really morons. and i think most morons understand they are morons, which makes these self proclaimed misunderstood genius a whole level of idiot. i don't think i'm a misunderstood genius. i mean, i think most people understand that i'm a genius. they just don't understand how i can be so damn cool. damn straight. who cares if i'm a moron. i'm a genius in my own eyes :D
ohhhh dear, how my mind is leaving me. it is a wonderful thing. i was so out of it this morning, and it was so worth it, for i have a new love. it comes in edible form, and doesn't require any damn smoking at all.
anyways... there is this girl that has been working for us. she cracks me up. she always manages to dress nicely, even though she's outside in the dirt with the rest of us. i'm all nasty and grungy, haven't washed my clothes in however long, and she has some cute little shirt with matching pants and sunglasses on. i think its just hilarious, because it makes no sense whatsoever, but some how she manages it. its just crazy. like, today she was wearing this cowboy hat thing. in the words of ryan, it was rad, just because it was rediculous, yet it made sense at the same time. seriously, its awesome...
my life has been taken over by this damn game. i'm trying to cut back. i didn't play last night, like at all. today i played for a little bit and i'm not playing anymore. thats a flat out lie, but at least i'm not playing for 8 hours straight. i'll take some time to not play here, because its better that way.
OH OH OH GOD HOW COULD I FORGET. raddest thing i've seen ever. me and matt go to safeway while waiting for our teriyaki. and omg, 12 gatorades for like 8 dollars. we scoured the store, and found 12 kinds we could get and enjoy. matt snagged a basket like the genius he is.... oh baby, so much gatorade, its beautiful. the guy at the counter was like, you know, you didn't have to get 12, they are on sale no matter how many you get. we were like, sorry guy we don't work that way. and its true. how could we get less than 12? that wouldn't make any damn sense at all. i mean seriously, i couldn't do that. that would be like cheating on gatorade. it would just get the shaft. and i can't do that to something i love as much as gatorade.
aaaaaaaaaaaaaah, ryan needs to get back, because he does... i mean shiot, ryan. having him not here already for like 2 damn weeks or whatever, not fair. its like putting a leash on a dog, then just hanging it on the door knob and wandering off, its just cruel. so now i have energy and such, but he's not going to be here, ever. EVER. shnikes
btw, ryan is so right, gatorade fierce tastes like jello melted down.
jing had a point, but he left in in his car. i had a rational brainpattern but i left it in vermont. i've never been to vermont.
waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhh BWAH BWAAAAAAAAAAAH
i'm so losing it. i feel like i have something to say, its just not coming. its kind of beautiful in a lazy sort of way.
so.... here i am, kind of dribbling out... realizing that i don't have anything to say anyways. peace out on the flipside
Monday, July 01, 2002
